The woahs of online dating

There’s a big stigma with online dating that you have to be desperate or whatever to try it and even more so to pay for it *cough eharmony and christian mingle cough cough* After researching the different sites and apps and talking to others who have used them I learned that tinder was for hook ups primarily and okcupid was decent. So I decided (not because I’m desperate) to try ok cupid. So below is some of the strangest responses to my profile I’m thinking that as I recieve more of these I’ll just update this post.

  1. “Hi I’m don and I read your profile and You sound like alot of fun. I’m 40 with a 7yr old son. I’m not quite divorced but we are separated” “Why aren’t you interested”….Hello 40! Hello still married! Hello kid!
  2. “Hi i’m Josh, You’re beautiful. you’re single yeah me too. I’d really love to date you, meet you, get to know eachother more, I want to tell you I’m a Virgin, and I’m looking to change that. What do you mean? You don’t like getting with people? I also love reading the bible to learn more about jesus…..Um WHAT? Not about to go into that (thats what he said)
  3. I’m sean from Saudi Arabia…I’m not dating long distance much less internationally!
  4. “Hi i’m brian and (after a good date) I just thought I should tell you I went to my dr and thought I should be tested I havn’t been with a women or 4 years but I thought I should be tested anyway. But I’m clean….Why do I need to know this on the first date?
  5. “Hi I’m larry I am so nervous for our first date…. I’ve known you for only a few days just chill out
  6. “Hi i’m jim. Why did you message me? After reviewing your profile you wouldn’t give me the time of day. After talking with you I’ve decided you’re one of the only women I can connect with mentally. When I move to asheville in a few weeks I already talked to my new boss and she’s agreed to take me off third shift and switch me to 1/2nd shift so we will have more time to hangout. Do you like me? We know alot about eachother so I don’t understand why you need space. Ok well take all the time you need. I guess since I havn’t heard from you in 3 days it means that you want me to eat you and lose your number ok consider it done….What happened to take all the time you need? why won’t you listen to me when i said I need to slow this train down and digest the information that has been so forcefully thrown at me?
  7. “Hi I’m john Wanna Hookup tonight?…What part of my profile screams I need a hookup TONIGHT!!
  8. “Hi I was just wondering if on your day off you’d want to go out and catch a movie?”
  9. ” after a rigorously brief overview of your profile i wanted to let you know I have already married and divorced you in my mind. thanks for all the wonderful imaginary memories. You will always have a special place in my heart. BTW I’m steve I like pizza with 8 toppings what about you?”…What the What? Do I even want to talk to you?

These have been my fun dating experiences. More to come for sure.

Published in: on August 10, 2015 at 4:06 am  Leave a Comment  
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